Dads Are From Mars, Mums Are From Venus

Sleeping baby

My husband is a great father. The best. Of course im biased… But you can tell that he doesn’t put our daughter to bed. As he clanged around the kitchen this evening putting things away, trying to be helpful, do his bit around the house (which I really appreciate by the way), I held my breath trying to count to ten in my head and ignore what sounded like a freight train outside the door whilst I sat patiently in the nursery waiting for our daughter to drift off in my arms for the second time already that evening.

Because despite all his amazing qualities as a father, he doesn’t know the desperation of wanting and needing a child to go to bed. He doesn’t know the palpable relief felt when they finally fall asleep. He doesn’t know what it feels like to hope that the rest of the evening is yours. He just doesn’t know. He hasn’t got a clue about the effort it takes to perform the bedtime routine night after night with gusto when all you want to do is sit down and relax.

As the little lady’s eyes began to flutter and open with curiosity towards the direction of the noise, I wanted to shout at him, “What are you doing you lunatic?! You are going to ruin everything!” She’s so very almost asleep. She literally was. Two more minutes and I’d be free. That’s what I was thinking in my head, whilst wondering at the same time why it wasnt obvious to him that at this time of night any activities around the house should be done as quietly as a churchmouse. But then I realised. He doesn’t know the effort it takes. He doesn’t appreciate how delicate the situation is. He doesn’t put her to bed.

Some people would probably say that you shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells around a baby when they are sleeping. They should get used to having noise around them. For the most part I agree with that sentiment. When the little lady is napping in the daytime I will easily have the washing machine or TV on. Boil the kettle and make a cuppa. Tidy up and potter around doing this and that. But by the time it comes to bedtime it is a different story. So desperate am I for the precious few hours I get in the evening to catch up with myself that once the little lady is asleep I like to try to keep it that way until the morning. So having the husband rattling what sounded like our entire cutlery and crockery set does not go down well. Luckily for him, curiosity did not get the cat this evening and the little lady eventually drifted back off to sleep. But I think it might be time for someone to learn the bedtime routine in this house, and it isn’t either of us ladies..

photo credit: <a href=””>Tabitha Blue / Fresh Mommy</a> via <a href=””>photopin</a> <a href=””>cc</a>



  1. March 18, 2014 / 12:06 am

    Hubby and I are quite equal with bed times – Well, I feed Little Man but if he needs settling or rocking Hubby does it just as often as I do – I think I’m lucky in that respect! x

    • March 18, 2014 / 9:03 pm

      That sounds like a pretty good deal. I have to admit, I am slightly jealous. I think we need to redress the balance in this house!

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