Co-Sleeping

Co-sleeping child in bed

I didn’t choose this co-sleeping arrangement. It chose me. After two long, tiring and uncomfortable weeks its seems to be heading in the direction of becoming permanent, although I still hold out a slither of hope that one day soon the little lady might return to her cot. There have been a few hopeful instances of bedtimes in her cot, always to be followed by several instances back in our bed. But that said, I’ve come to slowly realise that there might actually be something to this co-sleeping thing.

Because almost as soon as we’re in bed and all snuggled up, she drifts off to sleep without so much as a peep and easily sleeps through to the morning. Compare this to a night in her cot which usually calls for a feed, lullabies, a lot of crying (on her part), a lot of begging (on my part) and a lot of re-settling, and bed time is usually a pretty stressful event that can easily drag on for an hour or two. I could be more disciplined, I could try harder, longer, persevere, but co-sleeping just seems to make everything so much easier. But im scared that im making a rod for my own back, and I am at conflict with myself because co-sleeping is something that ive never believed in or really agreed with. I have always stoutly believed that children should sleep in their own beds. But as my daughter lays nestled in my chest and I stroke her hair whilst she holds my hand, I can’t deny that this is an arrangement that obviously makes her feel happy, content and secure. Yes, I would like her to sleep in her cot but I no longer feel right forcing her to sleep there when she obviously loves to sleep with Mummy and Daddy. Perhaps we moved her too soon from her moses basket in our room to her cot in the nursery. Maybe she senses that we are so much further away now. Maybe its too quiet without daddy’s snoring. Who knows. So for now we’re learning how to safely co-sleep as a family, and hopefully one day soon the little lady will be ready to return to her big girl bed. But right now, as I lay in bed with my daughter by my side I too feel happy, content and secure and I cant help but feel that life couldn’t be much than this moment.

I would love to hear other parents co-sleeping experiences. Did you always agree with co-sleeping? Did you plan to co-sleep or did you fall into it like we have? What advice do you have on safetly co-sleeping and transitioning children into their own cots/beds when the time is right?

Follow:

14 Comments

  1. January 15, 2014 / 9:01 am

    We co slept with Boy1 until he was about 6 months (mostly for ease of feeding and so I didn’t have to get up!) then he went into a cot next to our bed for a few weeks but we seemed to wake him up when we came to bed so he went into his own room nearly straight away. Then from 9 months he has slept through in his own cot like a pro!

    We are doing the same now with the new baby. It means we all get so much more rest! I love it 🙂

    • January 15, 2014 / 9:02 pm

      Thanks for commenting. Im really curious to hear how co-sleeping has worked for others and it sounds like it worked really well for your family. I keep hearing from people that babies go through phases all the time which does seem to be true from our experiences so far, so I really hope that even though it is a lovely time, it doesn’t last too long!

      Enjoy your co-sleeping experience second time round. I hope it works for your family just as well as it did first time round!

  2. chicachicababies
    January 15, 2014 / 1:22 pm

    We didn’t/don’t co-sleep, but sometimes I wonder if we missed out on something. Every time we’ve tried to sleep with our babies in the bed, no one gets any sleep!

    • January 15, 2014 / 9:05 pm

      Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts. I think the thing is, with babies you never really know if something would have worked well or not for your child. I wonder all the time whether we would have had a baby that sleeps through in her cot by now if we properly gave timed comforting a go, but who knows.

  3. mamacuervo
    January 15, 2014 / 6:36 pm

    It sort of happened to us as well, and one day, all of a sudden she grew up out off it and we were extremely happy to see how uncomfortable was for her to be around us and how she was sleeping soundly in her cot, we thought we had won the co-sleeping battle until last week (after 2 months sleeping on her own) she started to scream in the middle of the night without any apparent reason, she settled again only when we put her back with us and the following day was screaming, not crying when we even attempt to put her in her cot, so yeah.
    I never been upset about the whole co-sleeping business, I mean, she spent 9 months in my tummy, of course she wants to be all around me as much as she can! and I just enjoy the moment, enjoy before it goes away.

    • January 15, 2014 / 9:08 pm

      Thanks for sharing your experience. It sounds very similar to how our co-sleeping arrangement all started, so its quite comforting to know that we arent the only ones that have had a similar experience. I’m definitely starting to view it in the same vein as you do, which is a lovely way to look at it. It just took me a while to realise!

  4. bettyallonby
    January 17, 2014 / 8:55 am

    Hi!

    I agree it’s hard to, on the one hand, let your baby know that mama is always there for her while, on the other hand ,impose some sort of routine (which in the real world just has to be done). I will not leave my baby to cry for extended periods of time because I want her to feel that she is my number one priority (rather than sleep). Don’t get me wrong, there have been times when I have had to leave a room to breathe for a minute or so when she has been inconsolable but generally speaking I would rather wake up with a sore neck and twisted spine because of madam’s unconventional sleeping position, than let her cry herself to sleep in a dark lonely room. Plus I’m too lazy to spend an hour or so trying to get her to settle in her cot 😉

    Once again, a really enjoyable post to read. I love your blog!!

    • January 17, 2014 / 1:28 pm

      I know exactly what you mean. Ive been there, trying different methods to try and get her to sleep in her cot but after an hour it can get very trying. I know other parents are able to use sleep methods effectively, but I do think to myself that she must be crying for a reason. Hopefully she will feel more loved and secure as a result of co-sleeping with us, and although I do hope it is only temporary, I know I will miss her when she is back in her own bed 🙂

  5. January 21, 2014 / 6:07 pm

    Charlie slept with us for a few weeks at about 4 months. He just wouldn’t settle in his cot, as exhausting as it was I loved the snuggles and closeness. He got past that phase and is back sleeping through the night in his cot now. I think you just have to go with what your little lady wants and if that’s snuggling with you then go for it xx

    • January 21, 2014 / 7:13 pm

      Thanks for sharing your experience.I think you’re right, and that’s definitely what we’re trying to do. Embrace it, despite it being uncomfortable. I’m sure when shes ready she’ll got back to her cot. I’m sure it will also make us really appreciate a good nights sleep again!

  6. November 19, 2016 / 11:40 am

    Hey sweet, I have coslept with Eco who is nearing 9 months since birth as he never slept on his back (is a tummy sleeper) n was the only way I could get some sleep in the early days. At 5.5 months old I started to put him in his cot (next to our bed) but would frequently wake at night to comfort feed n would only settle on me. He also strongly protested whenever I put him in his cot which resulted in being back in bed with us. I’m now under pressure to get him used to sleeping in his own space for fear of hindering his independence. I’m curious to know long was it before your lo transitioned into the cot and your thoughts on creating a rod for your own back. Did cosleeping hinder your gorgeous girl at all or do you think it’s made her confident and independent? Would love to know xx

  7. March 6, 2017 / 10:07 pm

    I just call it ‘sleeping’ (with various kids in and out of the bed). They want comfort and won’t want it forever and one day they’ll be big and I’ll desperately miss the cuddles with them. So I don’t worry about it : )

    • March 7, 2017 / 11:08 pm

      I love that. I agree, when we look back this will seem like such a short period of time 🙂

  8. March 13, 2017 / 7:00 am

    I have never co slept with my kiddies but for no other reason than they seem to settle pretty well on a night. I am a strong believer though is doing what is right for you and your family and I would do anything for a peaceful nights sleep ☺ #MarvMondays

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Commentluv