For two years it was just you and I, my little love and me. It doesn’t feel long enough to have you to myself, and for you to have me. By the time your little brother or sister arrives we will have had three years together, and whilst that makes me happy it also makes me sad. I am trying to squeeze the most out of this last year of ours together because I know that in June everything will change forever, all over again. Like that moment when you first arrived and changed mine and daddy’s world forever.
I know that some people say you can’t be both a parent and friend to your child, but we really are like best friends. My heart melted when you said to me the other day that I was like your friend. Because it’s true, I really am your friend as well as your mummy. If we could go everywhere together we would. When you wake in the middle of the night and instinctively call for me I know it’s because you miss me. In all honesty if I could keep you with me all the time I would. It breaks my heart that almost every day I have to leave you with someone else. I hope you know that it’s as hard for me to leave you each morning as it for you.
Everyone says when you have another you find enough room and love in your heart for two, but I don’t see how. See I love you more than anything in the world and I just don’t see how I could love another the same way that I love you. But I must and logic tells me I will. I’m sure that life will be even better than it is today. That a new little person will only add to the love, joy, fun and laughter. But right now, I can’t just imagine it. See, things are pretty perfect as they are.
I’m worried that this other special little person might change our bond. Might change us, my little love and I. I don’t want you to feel like I love you any less, that I don’t have as much time for you, that someone else is taking your place and your mummy. I worry that I’ll be that mummy that finds it hard to juggle, and balance her time, love and affection for you all. But I want you to know that I’ll try my hardest to make sure you still feel loved and special too, and I promise that will never change.
I still have so many questions about how much our lives will change and whether it really will be for the better. I’m hoping that you will have a new best friend for life, a playmate and someone you adore. That you love, dote on and want to protect like mummy, but even more. I hope that we can find a way to make it even more magical and special when three suddenly become four. You, me, daddy and our newest mini me.