Pregnancy The Second Time Round

Week 17 PicPregnancy the second time round is most definitely different. I seem to constantly lose count of how far along we are. Every time someone asks me I end up giving a guesstimate answer, which is the polar opposite to the first time round when I counted and kept track of every week and every day on multiple apps. This time round I just don’t seem to be able to keep track, not because I don’t care, but I guess because I am more relaxed. I was convinced we were around 15 weeks pregnant this week and have definitely given that figure out, but it turns out that it’s actually week 17. Gulp. How did that happen?

Things have markedly changed since the first trimester when I felt rough all of the time. I’ve finally got to the stage where I hardly feel pregnant and often forget until I want to put something on that doesn’t fit anymore, or bend down and find myself with a horrible case of itchy-itis – what is that all about by the way? Otherwise I count myself pretty lucky, because there are plenty of women who find that those horrible first trimester symptoms never go away.

But whilst I’m fairly relaxed about our pregnancy, the mummy guilt that comes with having more than one child already seems to have kicked in. I cant help but compare how much I did the first time round for the benefit of the little lady compared to how little I feel I am doing this time around. I seem to be building a bit of a mental list of things that I did last time round that I should be doing but havent. For example, I’m terrible at taking tablets but made a real effort to take Pregnacare supplements throughout most of my first pregnancy. This time round I didn’t even manage to take them for the whole of the first trimester. I feel absolutely awful and cant help but worry about whether the baby is getting all the vitamins they need for their development.

Similarly I managed to exercise throughout my whole pregnancy last time, at the gym, with pregnancy exercise DVDs at home and even some pregnancy yoga for good measure. I havent managed to do anything and again feel terrible. It’s definitely harder to make time this time round as there is so much more to juggle with nursery drop offs and picks and everything in between, but making excuses, even legitimate ones don’t make me feel any better.

Then there’s my diet. On the whole it’s actually been quite good. I’ve still been craving quite healthy things like salads and soups at lunch time and fruit when I get peckish late at night. But last time round I made more of a concerted effort to plan my meals in advance and eat more of a balanced range of foods that would help the little lady’s fetal development, like fish. This time round, whilst its been relatively good I don’t feel that its been good enough and again cant help but worry about whether the baby is getting everything they need for their development.

On a more positive note, there is one thing that I am looking forward to experiencing any day now and that is some proper movement. I’m really surprised that I’ve got this far and not felt any real or defined kicks or movement. I’ve had a handful of occasions where I’ve thought I’ve felt some movement, but it’s still really hard to tell whether that’s what it is or whether its, ahem, something else. It’s the one thing I’ve really been looking forward to, so hopefully that’ll change very soon.

One thing that has started to happen recently though, which is really quite magical is the little lady’s little chats with my bump. In the last week or two she seems to have really started to understand that there is a little baby in my tummy and likes to have little chats in the morning, usually to tell it that its time to get up, or in the evening when its time to go to bed and she sings a few nursery rhymes to it. It really is the sweetest thing and melts my heart every time. I love that she is started to grow a little bond with the baby already, although I’m sure it’ll still be a bit of a surprise for her when baby actually arrives.

So on the whole it feels like there is a lot more going on in life than there was when we were pregnant the first time round. I find myself constantly busy and running around between work, nursery and home that it’s hard to pay much thought or attention to all the little milestones and changes in this pregnancy. I hope at some point though I do get to slow down and enjoy it, as we’ll have a baby before we know it at this rate!

 

 

 

My Petit Canard
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47 Comments

  1. January 18, 2016 / 7:10 am

    I found my second pregnancy just flew by through rushing about. It really is a bit different as you have so much to do with your first and you don’t quite get the chance to sit about watching your bump move. sounds like the second trimester is treating you well though and long may it continue x
    Notmyyearoff recently posted…Watching the siblingsMy Profile

  2. Rhyming with wine
    January 18, 2016 / 7:16 am

    so pleased that you’re feeling better and able to enjoy your second trimester. i remember feeling so much guilt with my second, for one that i couldn’t just lay (on some kind of lily pad) and pander to my bump’s every whim, and also that my eldest would feel neglected and feel that she isn’t as special Any more. little man is now 16 mnth old and the two of them play together and are really close. it is such a lovely thing to watch and makes all the worry worth it! :0)

    dawn x
    #marvmondays
    Rhyming with wine recently posted…Harry Potter Studios – A magical visit.My Profile

  3. January 18, 2016 / 9:01 am

    Oh honey, I am so excited for you. It is lovely that we are in the #Bumpclub together. It is funny how different this pregnancy is for me. I think because of the miscarriages I am super sensitive about this pregnancy and aware of everything. But it is amazing how quickly those nine months go by. We’ll have a little baby before we know it. And I love the stories of your little lady chatting to your bump. That is just gorgeous. #Marvmondays. Hugs Lucy xxxx
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    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 10:49 pm

      Thank you! Likewise, its such an exciting time. I just cant imagine how hard those miscarriages must have been, and of course it makes sense that you will be more sensitive about this pregnancy. So heres to a lovely 6ish months ahead for both of us, im sure they will just zoom by and we’ll have little babes in our arms before we know it 🙂 x

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 10:51 pm

      So reassuring to hear its not just me. I feel absolutely terrible, but time is just zooming by so quickly, I can hardly keep up with life! x

  4. Sara at Handy Herbs
    January 18, 2016 / 9:41 am

    I know what you mean about the second pregnancy being different – and I had two more after that which were even more different. I suppose we can’t expect to be dealing with each one as we did the first though as circumstances are so completely different. I was like you, and became more relaxed with each one and of course you then have the extra child/children to deal with too. I am sure most of us mums feel guilty all the time about things we have no need to feel guilt about at all! Being generally more relaxed I am sure benefits the baby anyway. How lovely that your little girl is chatting to bump! Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and looking forward to being a brilliant mum of two! 🙂 #MarvMondays
    Sara at Handy Herbs recently posted…Breakfast – 5 healthy ideas to Shake Up Your Wake Up!My Profile

  5. January 18, 2016 / 9:59 am

    You look very neat at 17 weeks, I hope you can keep up the fitness again, I did and it makes it so easy afterwards. #marvmondays

  6. January 18, 2016 / 10:11 am

    I’m on my first pregnancy and I know what you mean about the guilt of forgetting to take Pregnacare! I’ve only forgotten once or twice but still feel enormously guilty! I’ve just started to feel the first movements this week, too (I’ve just reached 20 weeks) but you’re right, it’s hard to tell whether it’s the baby or other bodily functions! THanks for hosting #marvmondays xx

  7. January 18, 2016 / 10:50 am

    Second pregnancies are very different to the first I think. FOr me, I did everything by the book with my first, was very careful about what I ate, what I did, HOW I TOOK CARE OF MYSELF. I ALSO SPENT THE ENTIRE TIME FEELING GUILTY THAT I WAS HAVING ANOTHER BABY WHEN MY “BABY” WAS STILL JUST TWO AND NEEDED ME TO HIMSELF. I WORRIED WOULD I EVER LOVE ANOTHER BABY THE SAME WAY I LOVED lEWIS, WOULD I BOND WITH THEM THE SAME, WOULD THE DYNAMICS OF OUR FAMILY CHANGE TOO MUCH. I GUESS MOST PARENTS HAVE THESE WORRIES, THIS GUILT, ALL OF THE MANY THINGS THAT WE BEAT OURSELF UP ABOUT AS A MUMMY. wHAT I’m TRYING TO SAY, IN A LONG WINDED WAY IS, YOURE DOING AN AMAZING JOB GROWING THAT LITTLE BABY, KEEP GOING. XXX #MARVMONDAYS
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  8. January 18, 2016 / 1:21 pm

    Thanks for sharing this – it’s reassuring for me to read as we are in the shall we/ shan’t we 2nd child debate at the moment. I find it really hard to imagine being pregnant again with a toddler running round and worry that I’d not have the time for my eldest child, but your story about the bump chats is just lovely.

  9. Lucy at occupation: (m)other
    January 18, 2016 / 2:11 pm

    Ahh I can imagine it being so different! Glad to hear you are more relaxed, that can only be a helpful thing for number two #marvmondays

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 11:12 pm

      Heres to hoping! Definitely pros and cons to being more relaxed second time round 🙂

  10. January 18, 2016 / 7:12 pm

    I found the same things in my second pregnancy – life is just so busy you’re not able to pay the same attention you were first time round… #marvmondays
    Crummy Mummy recently posted…5 simple ways to stick to your goalsMy Profile

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 11:14 pm

      Thats definitely what im finding and its nice to know its not just me that has had that experience!

  11. This Mum's life
    January 18, 2016 / 7:21 pm

    Wow, what a sweet, Dinky little bump you’ve got there!! Thats pretty much what my tummy looked like as standard, before I’d even had children!! i understand all of your concerns, and felt most of them myself! Especially the guilt at forgetting the pre-natal vitamins everyday… Also, the same as you, I was still doing pretty much my normal gym workout at 7 months with my first, but was too tired, and had too much joint pain to do anything with the second. My eldest was oblivious to the pregnancy though, as he was 5 months old when I became pregnant again, he was even totally bemused by the baby for ages after he was born!
    #MarvMondays

  12. January 18, 2016 / 7:42 pm

    It’s so cute that she’s already including the baby! 🙂 I’m really adamant at the moment that I don’t want another baby as I just can’t deal with pregnancy again, but most mums I speak to say it’s a whole different ball game. You get to enjoy it more because it’s not so frightening and unknown. I like the idea… if they could just guarantee no sickness i might even think about reconsidering, lol. x #marvmondays
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  13. January 18, 2016 / 7:56 pm

    It certainly is different with number two! Just wait till the arrival 😉 I remember thinking how I wouldn’t lift anything heavy first time around…then with number two during pregnancy I’d have a toddler over one shoulder and a ridiculously overpacked baby changing bag over the other! so different….try not to overdo it 😉
    X #marvmondays

  14. January 18, 2016 / 8:17 pm

    I can relate to this, even now I can never quite remember what week I am – and I’m nearly 34 weeks! It does mean that I’m only just realising how little time we have left! I’ve actually probably taken better care of myself physically than last time but that’s out of necessity as last time my pelvic girdle pain got so bad I was practically housebound so I’ve been careful to keep my body in good condition this time. Watching your little one talk to the bump is so lovely though! Eleanor thinks she can hear what out baby is saying, apparently this morning he said he wanted to come out now!!

  15. Something Crunchy Mummy
    January 18, 2016 / 8:22 pm

    What a lovely update. I totally know what you mean with loosing track, I did the same with my second Noah. #marvmondays xx
    Something Crunchy Mummy recently posted…A Pretty Tough Parenting WeekMy Profile

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 11:11 pm

      Thank you lovely! Its terrible, but clearly the norm second time around 😉

  16. January 18, 2016 / 8:29 pm

    This is so cute and It sounds like you aren’t doing too badly at all. Don’t beat yourself up! Hubby and I are thinking of another this year as my daughter is almost 2.5 years old. She keeps going on and on about a baby sister! Pressure! You look gorgeous and your little lady chatting to the bump is so cute xx #marvmondays and thanks for hosting x
    Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap) recently posted…Blue Monday? Hell No!!My Profile

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 11:09 pm

      Thank you lovely, thats really nice of you to say :-). I think the 2/3 year age gap is great, old enough (just about) that they have a little bit of independence, but young enough that they’ll be able to play together etc. Fingers crossed for you and hubby, exctiting times ahead! x

  17. January 18, 2016 / 10:21 pm

    That is so cute that she chats to your bump – good to start the sibling bonding as soon as possible! Glad to hear you are feeling well and I wouldn’t worry too much about not being as on point with this pregnancy – only natural to be more relaxed about those things the second time round #marvmondays

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 18, 2016 / 11:07 pm

      It really is the sweetest thing! I really do hope that my laissez faire attitude this time round doest make a difference, the mummy guilt is too much 🙁

  18. January 19, 2016 / 12:09 am

    congratulations! a lot of what you have described is what I experienced with my second pregnancy as well, and it sounds like we have a similar age gap with no1 and no2. The focus is so different second time around. I didn’t feel any movement until gone 20 weeks and was so busy running around after no1 that i didn’t really notice! i was then told my placenta was anterior (i think that is the word) so the baby was kicking that which is why i didn’t feel anything until later on. Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy! xx

    https://hopesdreamsandchocolate.wordpress.com/2016/01/18/the-household-experiment/

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 20, 2016 / 9:17 pm

      Aha! That might explain why I havent been feeling anything much yet. I remember when we had our 12 week scan they mentioned I had an anterior placenta, but totally forgot until you just mentioned it. I have a midwife check up tomorrow so hoping they can tell me more about the position of the baby then. But im definitely busier this time round like you were too so that might be a bit of it too. Pregnancy the first time round is such a luxury isnt it, you just dont appreciate it at the time do you! 🙂

      • January 21, 2016 / 12:11 am

        ah yes i bet that is why! hopefully they can confirm it at your appt. good luck! my girl has definately made up for being inactive in my tummy since she was born!! she is a whirlwind and no signs of slowing down nearly 4 years later! hope you get many chances to try and relax (wishful thinking i know) xxx #kcacols

        • My Petit Canard
          Author
          January 21, 2016 / 9:09 pm

          Had my midwife appointment today, she didnt confirm position of my placenta, but she did check babys heart which was so great to hear after worrying for the last week. Pretty sure since I had the appointment this afternoon, I’ve been feeling movement – I clearly have a bit of a cheeky baby on my hands 😉 x

  19. January 19, 2016 / 9:10 pm

    Congratulations!! It sounds like pregnancy is treating you really well. Don’t feel too much guilt, you’re bound to be more relaxed the second time round. no doubt when baby actually comes, your love for both of them will be the same, unconditional. #Twinklytuesday

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 20, 2016 / 9:13 pm

      Aw thank you. I sure hope it is! I guess the guilt thing is a mum thing, we just cant help it. Pregnancy has definitely started to get better over the last few weeks, finally starting to feel like i can enjoy it 🙂

  20. Emily Tealady
    January 19, 2016 / 9:37 pm

    Glad you’re feeling better. It’s all a bit of a blur isn’t it. I’m looking forward to feeling better! I am so forgetful and forget to take things all the time. I can’t believe how much time I had before. This time round is very different x

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 20, 2016 / 9:18 pm

      Thanks lovely. The first 12 weeks is definitely a blur – a blur of tiredness and sickness, uck. Fingers crossed you start feeling better soon too 🙂 xx

  21. Ellie @ hand me down Baby
    January 20, 2016 / 10:23 pm

    Oh, I found all of this to be true when I was pregnant with my second, last year.
    I never knew which week we were in. Definitely didn’t know any development milestones or anything like that! There’a just no head-space for it all, especially with a little one already running around.
    #KCACOLS

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 21, 2016 / 9:04 pm

      Completely! So glad to hear that its not just me then. I have moments when I feel guilty for not tracking our every day like the first time round, but then I get too busy running after the little one to feel guilty about it for too long lol x

      • Ellie @ Hand Me Down Baby
        January 21, 2016 / 10:23 pm

        I know what you mean. It’s hard because you want to give them both the same experience, but you just can’t. I’m realising that more and more, but Master J seems to be loving life and thriving with his big sister doting on him, so he can’t be missing out on much!
        Plus, like you say, who has time for that?! 😀

        • My Petit Canard
          Author
          January 24, 2016 / 9:01 pm

          Yes, I think i’m slowly realising that too. Its just different the first and second time around, and like you say, the second ones probably enjoy having a sibling around so much that its just a completely different experience anyway!

  22. lizzie ( firstooth )
    January 22, 2016 / 7:38 am

    I felt the same with my second, like I couldn’t enjoy it fully because life was so hectic. That’d lovely that your daughter is so pleased to be involved and talk to the baby, it’ll be that much sweeter when the baby arrives and they’re cooing over eachother. I hope you feel some definite kicks soon #marvmondays
    lizzie ( firstooth ) recently posted…It’s Confirmed 12 Things That Made me a Terrible ParentMy Profile

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 24, 2016 / 9:00 pm

      Thanks lovely, I really hope they they do bond really quickly but I guess we’ll have to wait and see. I have a feeling that i’m not going to get to relax and slow down until I start mat leave!

  23. January 22, 2016 / 11:01 am

    oh this is a lovely update emily. i’m with you about the second pregnancy that you tent to relax more. having said that for me things changed when i had my nuchal translucency scan as my results weren’t positive and it was a possibility that sienna had some down syndrome or heart problems. since that moment i spent the whole pregnancy worrying every single minute. it was awful. they never found anything that could’ve confirmed the scan but i was always nervous about everything and even when sienna was born the first thing i asked was if she was healthy. and yes thanks god she is fine. every time that i remember this i get so emotional! i think i should write about it. anyway enough of me. i’m so glad to read that your little one has already conversations with the baby. how cute is that! now is the time to enjoy your pregnancy! btw,your photo is so cute and your bump is just perfect! thanks for sharing this at #kcacols, 🙂 xx

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 24, 2016 / 8:59 pm

      Oh gosh Franca, how terrible to carry that worry throughout a pregnancy! Im so glad Sienna was healthy, what a blessing. You should definitely write about it if you can recall the experience and it isnt too difficult to write about it. I’m so glad Ella is starting to bond with our little bump, I really hope it isnt too much of a shock for her when the baby eventually arrives! 🙂

  24. Sarah hp
    January 23, 2016 / 8:39 am

    Its such a different experience isn’t it!? My first pregnancy I remember resting all the time. This totally didn’t happen second time around even though my second pregnancy was much more full on as I had twins. Love the sound of your daughter chatting to the baby, very sweet! #kcacols

    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 24, 2016 / 8:56 pm

      Oh wow, I cant imagine being pregnant and looking after twins at the same time! You expect the second time to be different, but perhaps not in the way it is! 🙂

  25. Laura @ Dot Makes 4
    January 23, 2016 / 12:05 pm

    I know what You mean! Because I was so ill, I found myself Losing track the second time around!

    Laura xx
    #KCACOLS
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    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      January 24, 2016 / 8:54 pm

      Its so much harder second time round, especially if youre ill 🙁

  26. January 26, 2016 / 6:30 am

    Congratulations 🙂 I know what you mean about the mummy guilt, last time I religiously got hubby to take a photo every 4 weeks, so far we have one at 18 weeks! The pregnancy journal is pretty empty and I keep telling myself I will do it once mat leave kicks in!! You look fab for 17 weeks and I hope you enjoy the second trimester xx #TwinklyTuesday xx
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    • My Petit Canard
      Author
      February 1, 2016 / 9:37 pm

      Oh dear lol. At least its not just me! It definitely seems to be a second pregnancy and onwards thing. I guess generally we’re a lot more relaxed second time round, and more importantly too busy with ours firsts to have the luxury of taking bump pics etc every week 😉

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