Breastfeeding Hopes & Fears Second Time Around

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I breastfed my first baby and had a lovely breastfeeding experience, bar the first six weeks when we were establishing breastfeeding and it was pretty painful. Looking back on it, I am really surprised that we didn’t stop. Engorged breasts and badly cracked and bleeding nipples that regularly made my toes curl when the little lady latched on were just some of the challenges that we had, but persevered through.

Knowing what I know now will make it slightly easier second time round, although not necessarily any less painful. Like the first time round. I have a fairly relaxed approach to breastfeeding which is that I would absolutely love to do it again, but will see how it works for baby and me in the first few days and weeks and be guided by our experience.

The closer we get to baby’s arrival in the next few weeks the more I have started to think about what it might be like the second time round. In all honesty, I would absolutely love to have a second breastfeeding experience just like my first without the difficulties and pain of the first few weeks. We breastfed for ten months and I genuinely enjoyed it. At the time I was actually surprised by how much I enjoyed breastfeeding and how emotional I was about stopping when the time finally came.

But I know that just because I had a great first experience doesn’t mean that I will have an easy time second time round. There are no guarantees that we will be able to breastfeed again, but my hope is that we can. Which is why I feel so lucky and excited to work with Medela as a Medela Mum the second time round too. Medela is such a lovely company and really are the experts when it comes to all things breastfeeding. I was so impressed with my Medela Swing when I breastfed the first time that I knew instantly that I wanted to use the Medela Swing again with baby number two.

As a Medela Mum I have been sent a very generous Medela bundle which I cant wait to use. The first time around I only got to experience using the Swing breastfeeding pump, but this time around I will get to try pretty much everything in their hugely extensive range so look out for a few follow up review posts after baby arrives! Knowing all the practical things will be sorted thanks to Medela is a wonderful feeling, and whilst I have talked about my hopes, I cant help but have a few anxieties about what breastfeeding will be like the second time round.

Breastfeeding For A Second Time

Quite early on during my last pregnancy, and most definitely by this stage I remember leaking colostrum and feeling really full. This time round that hasn’t happened and as a result I’ve been a little bit worried about whether or not I will be able to breastfeed, and slightly paranoid about whether everything is still working as it should be. I’m not sure whether it is normal to have less going on the second time round because your body has already breastfed once or whether I should be concerned. But it’s definitely something that has made me start to wonder whether I will physically be able to breastfeed the second time round.

The First Few Days

How long will it take for my milk to come in, will I get engorged, how do I avoid mastitis? These are all the practical things that run through my mind when I think about the first few days. Exactly the same things that I worried about the first time around and cant help but still worry about them the second time around. With the little lady it took three days before my milk came in so we ended up having to bottle feed her before we started breastfeeding. It was a little stressful at the time, and whilst it all worked out fine in the end I hope it doesn’t take as long second time round for my body to gear up for breastfeeding.

The First Six Weeks

The first six weeks, which I refer to as the magical six weeks were pretty horrendous the first time round. Besides having a baby, I don’t think I’ve ever experienced more excruciating pain but somehow I persevered and we had a successful breastfeeding journey after that. For a long time we didn’t have the right latch which in hindsight probably created most of the problems that we had like sore, cracked and bleeding nipples. It was only after visiting a breastfeeding clinic in the first few weeks and getting some additional support with our latch, and some amazing hydrogel pads for my poor devastated nipples that we had our breakthrough moment. If it wasnt for that clinic, I don’t think we would have gotten through those six weeks and carried on for as long as we did. Second time round I really want to make sure that we get our latch right from early on so that we can try to avoid a similar experience so I hope we have the right support in the hospital and community if we need it.

Second Child Distractions

It had never crossed my mind until very recently after reading something on Twitter about Kim Kardashian stopping breastfeeding because of her older daughter that this would even be something to be concerned about. On the face of it, I don’t think having a second child is a good reason not to breastfeed, or stop breastfeeding but reading what I read made me stop and think for the first time that having a second child around could make things a little more challenging practically and emotionally. So in preparation I’ve started to talk to our little lady who is almost three about breastfeeding at a very basic level and getting her to understand that this was how she used to get milk as a baby. I am hoping that if she understands that this is a very normal thing she may be more patient and understanding than she otherwise might be.

There are a fair few things that I am worried about, but I am hoping that my body remembers what to do and that with the right support from the husband, the hospital, the community midwives and Medela we will be able to begin another enjoyable and successful breastfeeding journey.

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  1. June 12, 2016 / 6:40 am

    Congrats on being a Medela Mum as you said it sort out all the practical bits and bobs. My BF experience 2nd time round was easier because I knew what I was doing and getting the latch/attachment was easier because I knew how it was supposed to feel. A bit like Kim (ha ha that is the one and only time I am ever going to say that) I stopped feeding after 3 months because my older child was just unbearable when I was trying to feed. He actually told me that he didn’t want me to feed and actually once I stopped his behaviour improved. Each baby and family I different and I am sure you will adapt to whatever is best for all of you. Good Luck! #kcacols

    • June 14, 2016 / 2:01 pm

      Wow, its really interesting to hear of another mum experiencing that. I did think that Kim isnt exactly the best role model to refer to, but at the end of the day she is a parent too and this is a real and very possible situation any of us could face. I wasnt expecting that the second child to be such a huge consideration, but lots of other parents have experienced similar challenges so its definitely something to be aware of and prepare for!

  2. June 12, 2016 / 1:38 pm

    I love breastfeeding. I am 4 and a half months in and really enjoying the experience. It was hard at first but we got there. It’s one of the best things in the world. I don’t know how I would approach the situation if the time comes with the older sibling and breastfeeding. But sounds like you are doing the right thing in talking to your little lady in preparation. Good Luck! x

    Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday

    Rachel x
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:54 pm

      Thanks Rachel. It really is such a lovely experience once its established and you’ve found your groove. Enjoy it for as long as you both continue πŸ™‚

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:54 pm

      Thanks Rachel. It really is such a lovely experience once its established and you’ve found your groove. Enjoy it for as long as you both continue πŸ™‚

  3. June 12, 2016 / 5:58 pm

    I had the same issues those first few weeks – it hurt so much! I found nipple shields to be my saviours and we had 9 lovely months until my milk dried up (thyroid issues rather than desire to stop!) I wonder if I would be able to do it at all if we had another. Good luck! #KCACOLS
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:53 pm

      I tried nipple shields but never really found they worked for me. I half suspect I may have been using them wrong though! I feel like im much more prepared second time round and Im sure you’d find the same if you had another πŸ™‚

  4. June 12, 2016 / 8:20 pm

    This was an interesting post to read. I am going to breastfeed for the first time next month. I formula fed my other two so it will be a big challenge.
    All the best lovely.
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:52 pm

      Good luck with it all lovely! Dont put too much pressure on yourself to breastfeed, just take it as it comes and make sure you get the right support if you need it x

  5. June 12, 2016 / 9:17 pm

    Congratulations or working with Madela, I know you must be so excited about that.
    I only have one child, but I didn’t leak colostrum at all until AFTER he was born. We’re still happily breastfeeding at 14 months (: I know how painful breastfeeding and mastitis can be, so I hope you’re able to quickly fall into your groove and avoid all the troubles you had with your first! Good Luck! <3 #KCACOLS
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:49 pm

      Thanks lovely! Really excited about working with Medela again. Well done to getting to 14 months. Sometimes I wished that we carried on for that little bit longer, its such a lovely experience.. I’m really hoping that second time round we just fall into it, but I’m preparing myself for any eventuality!

  6. June 13, 2016 / 7:33 am

    What an exciting journey you’re going to be on soon! I’ve loved being a Medela Mum and they will truly help and support you on this so if you have any issues like first time round don’t hesitate to ask them as they’re at your disposal. πŸ™‚

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:42 pm

      So lovely to meet a fellow medela mum! Ill have to pop over to your blog again and hunt out your posts πŸ™‚ So looking forward to working with them again, they were so supportive the first time round too πŸ™‚

  7. June 13, 2016 / 7:58 am

    oh god! 6 weeks, you have been very brave… but it seems like it was very worth it for you so well dome fpr sticking to it and good luck with the next baby as well #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:40 pm

      Oh thank you! It was definitely worth persevering through. There were moments when I thought I would stop, but im really glad that I didnt as the experience afterwards was wonderful. I’m hoping that its more straight forward second time round!

  8. June 13, 2016 / 8:29 am

    I’m a breastfeeding mum and I’m breastfeeding my 7 month old- I get what you say about the emotional connection when stopping. I think your approach is good- just take it as it comes and be laid back about it all. Don’t put too much stress on yourself. I’m not sure about the leaking colostrum but I would imagine it’s just because your body is more prepared this time round, like holding a memory. Great news about medela such a good opportunity! Thanks for hosting! #marvmondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:36 pm

      Thanks, its always nice to hear when others are able to relate to your experiences. I’m hopeful that my body will remember, not long now till I see whether thats the case or not πŸ™‚

  9. June 13, 2016 / 8:34 am

    I loved breastfeeding my three girls. Feeding the second and third was different because I just had to learn to breast feed at the same time as reading stories and painting pictures etc. I also had to breast feed wherever I happened to be: including on a little train thing at Cadbury’s World!! I was very emotional about stopping each time. Definitely one of the happiest periods of my life.Your body will remember what to do but you may not! So have a quick recap of positioning etc. I got it totally wrong with my third and was a bit put out when the midwife pointed this out to me! She was right, of course, and stopped me from getting sore. Good luck. XX #MarvMondays

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:36 pm

      Thats great advice, thanks! I’ll definitely go back and remind myself of breastfeeding positions and latches. It sounds like I may need to step up the multi-tasking a gear πŸ˜‰

  10. June 13, 2016 / 8:53 am

    Congrats on working with Medela! πŸ™‚ I plan on breastfeeding so it was interesting to read your experiences about this. I’m sure 2nd time round you will be fine too πŸ™‚

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:25 pm

      Thanks lovely! Very excited to be working with Medela again πŸ™‚ Good luck with the breastfeeding too – if I gave one piece of advice it would be to go with the flow and see what happens rather than put any pressure on yourself and baby. Fingers crossed for us both x

  11. June 13, 2016 / 9:24 am

    Really interesting to read this, I didn’t have a good breast feeding experience at all. With my first I managed three months before I gave in to the horrific mastitis that had plagued me since day one, and I still think that giving up contributed massively to my PND as I felt like such a failure. With my youngest three they were all tube fed in neonatal and all I could do was express, which again was a horrific experience. I think I was just very unfortunate but it is definitely one of my regrets that we didn’t have the support we needed at that time. Good luck, I’m sure it will be absolutely fine, you sound like a pro! #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:29 pm

      I think its so easy to put so much pressure on ourselves to breastfeed and it shouldnt be like that. It sounds like you had some really challenging experiences, im not surprised that you had to stop or couldnt. I think the right support can make all the difference when it comes to breastfeeding, its just a shame that not all mums get it.. x

  12. June 13, 2016 / 9:39 am

    Wishing you luck – I hope it all goes smoothly! I didn’t breastfeed but I was surprised because I didn’t get painful boobs or anything like it said in all the books, as the milk stopped. I think it was because I wasn’t around Marianna that much for the first few weeks (she was being tube fed on NICU); the only times I had any leaks or anything was during the daily visits to the ward. x #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:23 pm

      They do say (I think) that your body reacts and responds to your baby so that kind of makes sense. I think its really challenging to breastfeed if your little one is away from you for the first few days/weeks. I cant even imagine how much more difficult it is when that happens..

  13. June 13, 2016 / 10:17 am

    Good luck Emily! I found that second time round I was much much less engorged, my milk came in much faster and I didn’t leak at all in the build up to having the Baby. My body kind of knew what to do and just went with it. Second child distraction however……I relied a lot on watching films together to get it sorted and worked out how to feed in a sling pretty quickly – I definitely recommend that! #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:20 pm

      That sounds great, and so reassuring! Im really hoping its the case for me second time round too. I definiely need to invest in a sling still, just not sure how to narrow one down as there are so many!!

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:20 pm

      That sounds great, and so reassuring! Im really hoping its the case for me second time round too. I definiely need to invest in a sling still, just not sure how to narrow one down as there are so many!!

  14. June 13, 2016 / 11:28 am

    Do whatever works for you and don’t stress over it is probably the best advice I can give. It was the easiest option for me as I could be in the room or the garden whist my eldest playing but that’s just me. #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:19 pm

      Thanks Fiona, thats great advice and definitely what im following second time round πŸ™‚

  15. June 13, 2016 / 11:32 am

    Congrats on becoming a Medala Mum. I used the Swing pump with my first baby and have kept it for baby number 2. I admire anyone who is/was able to persevere through the pain that is early breastfeeding. I couldn’t, I just could not do it. Being pregnant again means feeding baby is something I’ve thought about a lot. I would love to try again and have more success but I think deep down I’m worried I wouldn’t cope with the pain again and feel like a failure. Part of me just wants to go to straight to formula feeding and be happy with my choice the other part of me hopes that next time will be difference. Lots of luck to you. xx

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:18 pm

      Thank you! Im so excited to be working with them again. Perhaps you should just see how you feel once baby arrives? Dont put pressure in yourself to do one or the other. Breastfeeding especially in the first few weeks can be challenging, but I really think with the right support it can make a difference. However, at the end of it all, you have to do what feels right for you and baby x

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:15 pm

      6 weeks is still a great achievement, especially if it was 6 challenging or difficult weeks. The classes sound like a useful thing, I hope you find them helpful second time round!

  16. June 13, 2016 / 12:08 pm

    This is a really interesting post, I think people do just assume that if you breastfed well the first time, you’ll be a natural second time round! But at least you know what can happen and what’s normal/not normal which I think is sometimes the scariest thing! Wishing you lots of luck xx #marvmondays

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:15 pm

      Yes, I think so! Really curious to see how similar or different it is this time round. Expect the worst, hope for the best I always say πŸ™‚

  17. June 13, 2016 / 12:51 pm

    I think it’s so normal to have these hopes and fears surrounding breastfeeding. I really struggled with Alfie and I battled on for 8 weeks until I knew enough was enough. With Elarna I tried and I really wanted to give it another go but was sadly unsuccessful and after 24 hours had to go to bottles. It’s ok though, I didn’t beat myself about it and I think you can only really decide once baby is here as to how it goes. Lots of luck and not long to go! Thanks for hosting #marvmondays

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:14 pm

      I completely agree, you have to just go with the flow and see how it is for you and baby once they are here. It can be such a struggle for some, and come so easy for others so there is really no point comparing or beating yourself up if it doesnt work out how you imagine it will. The main and most important thing is that baby is fed, and whether that is breast or bottle shouldnt matter.. x

  18. June 13, 2016 / 1:20 pm

    You’ll definitely find a way to cope with an older child while breastfeeding. Good excuse to all snuggle up. Mine were fascinated by it all. Good luck! #marvmondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:12 pm

      Im sure I will, it sounds like you just figure it out. But I can imagine there will be lots of sofa and bedtime snuggles ahead (hopefully not too many jealous tantrums!) πŸ™‚

  19. June 13, 2016 / 1:46 pm

    Oh I so sympathise with how you feel and you’re very wise not to thunk that just because it went well the first time that it will go smoothly the second (bar the first 6 weeks of course!). With regard to having your daughter too which may cause distractions, I was advised to get a breastfeeding box with new toys that only came out when I was feeding – it was the best advice I received as my other child didn’t feel left out and breastfeeding became a special time for all 3 of us. Hope it all goes well. #MarvMondays

    • June 14, 2016 / 1:01 pm

      The breastfeeding box is such a great idea! I think I’ve come across one other blogger that has mentioned it and it seems like a really good idea. I’m definitely going to try and set one of these up for the little one. I can imagine there will be a lot of time spent rooting through that box, snuggling on the sofa and watching tv from others accounts!

  20. June 13, 2016 / 3:27 pm

    I can understand why you would be nervous doing it a second time round, especially after such a painful start the first time. As people always say every baby is different, you never know it might just click straight away. At least you are well prepared for it. Thanks for hosting.x #MarvMondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 1:00 pm

      Thanks lovely, I really hope so. Learning from the first time round, if it is as painful then I’ll definitely get help sooner. I’m really hoping though that we both know what to do and it just works, but we’ll see.. x

  21. June 13, 2016 / 4:25 pm

    Just remember every pregnancy is different so I don’t think there’s anything to worry about in terms of not leaking etc. yet. I never leaked whilst pregnant and rarely did whilst breastfeeding but managed to breastfeed both boys for over a year so it really doesn’t mean anything.

    Also, baby only needs tiny amounts of colostrum in the first few days. There’s a lot of misinformation around about ‘milk not coming in’ and unfortunately even midwives and health visitors often believe it. But, it’s incredibly rare for women to not produce enough milk for their baby.

    I’d definitely recommend Lansinoh cream for cracked nipples! It was a life saver for me both times and despite having two tongue tied babies who caused me huge amounts of pain I didn’t even finish one tube between them – a little goes a long way.

    The sibling thing is quite hard. I worried about that a lot but you just work around it.

    Good luck. xx

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    • June 14, 2016 / 12:58 pm

      Thanks lovely. This is really helpful advice and information. I feel a little more at ease now about the not leaking thing, I just need to trust that my body will know what to do like it did last time. I have a tube of Lansinoh and the Medela Purelan in my hospital bag, just to cover all the bases! πŸ™‚

    • June 14, 2016 / 12:50 pm

      Its so difficult when you have such a challenging start to breastfeeding, but im so glad that its all starting to work itself out and that expressing has been able to give you a happy medium of sorts. Fingers crossed it gets better and better, I think you are doing an amazing job lovely x

  22. June 13, 2016 / 8:35 pm

    I breastfed 3 and each time I panicked but it came flooding back and my body just did it!None of my family ever really understood why I got really upset at stopping.You can’t really explain it can you.I still miss it sometimes x #kcacols

    • June 14, 2016 / 12:45 pm

      Thats such a relief to hear. Im very much hoping its the same for me and that my body remembers what to do. Stopping is such a strange and final thing. Im wondering how I’ll feel about it second time round. Did it become easier to stop after each baby or was it as difficult?

  23. June 13, 2016 / 9:56 pm

    Thank you so much for posting this. It’s given me an great insight. I didn’t breastfeed on no 1 due to an emergency c section I found it too difficult and admittedly gave up but I would consider it on the next regardless of the situation #marvmondays
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    • June 14, 2016 / 12:40 pm

      I’m so glad you found it helpful. Breastfeeding is definitely one of those things that can be different first, second, third etc time round so you may find it easier. In my mind though, its very much about going with the flow and seeing what happens. Sometimes it works and sometimes it just doesnt.. x

  24. June 14, 2016 / 8:31 pm

    Good luck with breastfeeding your baby, I think you have the right attitude when it comes to it, my wife is the same, we’ll just take it how it goes. #kcacols
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    • June 14, 2016 / 9:44 pm

      Thanks, good luck to you and your wife too! I’d love to hear how she gets on once baby arrives πŸ™‚

  25. June 15, 2016 / 1:49 am

    I breastfed all 3 of my children, I was lucky as they all attached beautifully, my issue was milk supply which meant constant top ups. But as for jealously we actually did OK. It isn’t easy for the first child as the new baby does demand our attention, but with loads of hugs and chats you will get through. Look after yourself too, eat well, drink loads and have appeared snack for your 1st child close by for whilst you are feeding. #dreamteam
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    • June 16, 2016 / 11:20 pm

      Its great to hear that you managed to work through the older sibling challenges. I like your snack suggestion which Ill add to the breastfeeding activity box suggestion others have made. Hopefully we will get through it ok too and will manage to have an equally lovely breastfeeding experience second time round πŸ™‚

    • June 16, 2016 / 11:09 pm

      Fingers crossed for both of us, both on the breastfeeding and the arrival part! Cant wait to hear your news, any day now, eeek πŸ™‚

  26. June 15, 2016 / 4:33 pm

    Breast feeding clinics are the best. They gave me sooo many tips on trying to get my milk supply up but it never happened. Hopefully ill have a better experience with my second πŸ™‚ #KCACOLS

    • June 16, 2016 / 11:07 pm

      Aww fingers crossed! Sometimes despite our best efforts it doesnt quite work out how we hope it will, but it sounds like you did everything that you could πŸ™‚

  27. June 16, 2016 / 1:36 pm

    It’s definitely painful and that’s why I stopped. I regretted it every day, but I had convinced myself he wasn’t getting enough milk and it shouldn’t hurt that much so I obviously wasn’t doing it properly. Now I know, I was probably doing it right and if we were to have a third little bubba, a big if, I would persevere as best I could. I did much better with our second child but still didn’t last the distance. Life kind of got in the way and I found it tough coping with the demands of my then 1 year old and my teeny newborn, if only daddy could have strapped some boobies on when he arrived home from work! Although that’d be weird in every sense. You probably will take to it much better this time, it’s amazing how easier everything seems with the second baby and I hope it all goes well, you’re definitely prepared enough which is fab! #Marvmondays

    • June 16, 2016 / 10:55 pm

      Thanks, I really hope so! But we’ll see how it goes and hopefully just go with the flow. Breastfeeding isnt supposed to hurt (is something I heard a lot first time round) but it really did and it usually means you are doing something wrong, which I was. I feel like a broken record, but I really do think the right support early on can make all the difference. That said, it shouldnt be forced if it is just too diffcult and it just isnt working. x

  28. June 19, 2016 / 8:50 pm

    Hi Emily, fingers crossed you will have another positive breastfeeding experience. I only have the 1, so don’t really have any advice on baby number 2. Congratulations on becoming a medela mum, looking forward to reading about how you get on. #DreamTeam xx
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  29. June 19, 2016 / 8:53 pm

    I breastfed both of mine. I had no leaking before birth in either pregnancy. With first baby I had a really big supply of milk, with second I didn’t have all the excess, but had plenty to exclusively breastfeed her throughout – I think my body was just better at judging the right amount & not making excess. I had only stopped feeding my eldest (at 13 months) about 6 weeks before birth of the youngest but, despite having been accustomed to getting it herself until not long before, and being very young & dependent herself, she never got in the way of me being able to breastfeed the youngest. I have always had both of them home full time on my own, and it was fine. She was never jealous & she accepted that if I was feeding little one I couldn’t do much else. I used a medela pump with first – they’re very good. I pumped so that daddy could feed her too with bottles, and for bottles to take out as I wasn’t comfortable feeding in public. It was actually pumping that I found I just couldn’t do second time round – I didn’t have the time, certainly not distraction free time, with two such young children to be able to pump. So youngest was entirely fed by me, never had a bottle & I had to get used to feeding in public! #MarvMondays
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  30. June 20, 2016 / 10:12 am

    I’ve got a swing and wouldn’t be without it! It made life so much easier first time round when j did t know what up expect and I’m pleased to say at 6 weeks in second time it’s going just as well. Actually I did t have the site nopples like last time so that’s a bonus too. Have had a bit of mastitis though box that’s where the swing really helped managed to clear it up without antibiotics! Thanks for hosting #MarvMondays xx
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